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For all you pony lawyers or guys thinking of getting married

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 4:36 pm
by ponydawg
Get a load of this contract that this guy tried to get his wife to sign......
creepy......yet inspired...


http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/02 ... ract1.html


Fear the Pony.

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 5:24 pm
by jtstang
From henceforth all contracts eminating from the Law Offices of jtstang shall be printed using these fonts.

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 5:34 pm
by DiamondM
What frightens me is that she actually (a) married him (if presented as a pre-nup); or (b) stayed married to him (if presented after she said her vows).

Her reaction should have been: "Are you f***ing kidding me? If you want a woman who will agree to that nonsense, you better go find yourself a 17 year-old illiterate mail-order bride from Thailand. See you later, chumpspank."

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 6:09 pm
by jtstang
DiamondM wrote:"See you later, chumpspank."

Excuse me, counsel, are you using that as a term of art?

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 6:19 pm
by Stallion
I'd be surprised if that document even gets admitted into evidence unless there is some type of corroborating evidence. Its not signed, not initialed, not in his handwriting, doesn't even have their names in the type set and it appeard to be nothing more than gag-form. I have one a helluva a lot funnier in my files-I bet just about every lawyer does. I wouldn't be so quick to Judgment. I think I'll ask for a new jury..

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 6:57 pm
by McClown27
Stallion wrote: I have one a helluva a lot funnier in my files-I bet just about every lawyer does. I wouldn't be so quick to Judgment. I think I'll ask for a new jury..


How can you practice law when there is so much recruiting information to absorb? :lol:

What is your specialty Stallion?

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 9:52 am
by SMU Football Blog
Stallion wrote:I'd be surprised if that document even gets admitted into evidence unless there is some type of corroborating evidence. Its not signed, not initialed, not in his handwriting, doesn't even have their names in the type set and it appeard to be nothing more than gag-form. I have one a helluva a lot funnier in my files-I bet just about every lawyer does. I wouldn't be so quick to Judgment. I think I'll ask for a new jury..


Objection overruled, counselor. You will have the opportunity to address the document on cross-examination.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 1:54 pm
by abezontar
Even if the document was a joke for most people, he may have picked it up and tried to get his wife to sign it. We are talking about a pervert here, am I the only one that noticed that he is being charged with kidnapping his wife, and possessing child pronography!!!

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 3:44 pm
by White Helmet
Thinking of funny files, a friend of mine who is a Surveyor has a land deed that is dated from 1999, that says the land is only to be "inhabited and owned by people of the caucasian race." Pretty embarassing.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 4:29 pm
by EastStang
I've seen those as late as about 1972 but after that its very rare. Before 1972, it was pretty common. There was an article in yesterday's Washington Post about a book on "Sundown Towns" where blacks had to be out of town by sundown or face arrest. There were over 1000 towns like that in America according to the author of the book. Not funny, but something to remember. The guy who wrote that contract is just plain sick, even if he downloaded it from the internet as a joke and gave to his wife as a joke. Living here in the land of Lorena Bobbitt, I would know better than to send that to my wife. The guy would be lucky to keep his Johnson.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 5:54 pm
by DiamondM
jtstang wrote:
DiamondM wrote:"See you later, chumpspank."

Excuse me, counsel, are you using that as a term of art?


Indeed. Check it out in Black's Law Dictionary. From the Olde English for "D*ckweed."

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 6:44 pm
by Stallion
Rice Institute now Rice University was created by a Trust Agreement from its founder William Rice that required that it be an institution for the exclusive education of Caucasins.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 6:52 pm
by SMU Football Blog
Also, when Bush was running for President, it was discovered that that was a restrictive covenant on his home in HP. Even though it was unenforceable and Bush didn't even know about it, it caused some political "confusion" among certain segments of the population.