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by CalallenStang » Sat Jul 15, 2006 12:39 am
Found this on a high school board...
How many UT students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Fifty - one to screw it in, and the other 49 to complain because a person of their race, gender, or sexual preference didn't get to screw in the light bulb.
How many Rice students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One to screw it in and the rest of the student body to relieve the stress of screwing it in by running naked through campus.
How many TCU students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four - one to call Daddy to do it and the other three to find the perfect coordinating J. Crew outfits.
How many Texas Tech students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them: One to screw it in and the rest of the students to try desperately to establish a rivalry with the other Big XII schools in light bulb screwing.
How many U of Houston students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They don't want the gangs to know that they're in there.
How many Univ North Texas students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Who cares?
How many Baylor students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They aren't allowed to do that in Waco.
How many SMU students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to make the martinis and the other to hire someone else to screw the bulb in.
How many Aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three - one to screw it in, one to call it a tradition and the other to lead the yell "Screw The Hell Outta the Light bulb!"
How many Stephen F. Austin students?
3 - One to screw it in and two to laugh uncontrollably at the sexual connotations.
SWT Students?
4 - One to screw it in, two to move the keg into place and one to load the bong.
Sam Houston State Students?
None - they would just move back into their parents' house in Houston.
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CalallenStang
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by carter08 » Sat Jul 15, 2006 11:31 am
CalallenStang wrote:Found this on a high school board...
How many U of Houston students does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They don't want the gangs to know that they're in there.
.
Yeah, well, just because Uh is in a bad neighborhood. But seriously, i'm scared to go to games there because of the neighborhood its in
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carter08
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by MrMustang1965 » Sat Jul 15, 2006 2:01 pm
I lived in Houston from 1988 - 2004 and worked for the Houston Police Department. Not once - I repeat - NOT ONCE during that time do I recall a crime being reported to the department by someone attending a UofH athletic event, either at Robertson Stadium or at Hofheinz Pavilion.
Yes, some bad sh*t goes down in the wards surrounding UofH. But actual crimes on campus are few and far between.
Security on the UofH campus is very good. Emergency phones are strategically placed for quick access in all campus parking lots. Campus police are very visible, too.
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MrMustang1965
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by NavyCrimson » Sun Jul 16, 2006 2:21 am
great joke!!!
BRING BACK THE GLORY DAYS OF SMU FOOTBALL!!!
For some strange reason, one of the few universities that REFUSE to use their school colors: Harvard Crimson & Yale Blue.
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NavyCrimson
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by LonghornFan68 » Sun Jul 16, 2006 1:44 pm
meh.
Official Cult of Chris Phillips Member
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LonghornFan68
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by CalallenStang » Sun Jul 16, 2006 1:55 pm
LonghornFan68 wrote:meh.
What's wrong? Did no one in your "group" get to screw in a lightbulb?
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CalallenStang
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by MrMustang1965 » Sun Jul 16, 2006 3:33 pm
I always heard that it was 3 Aggies: 1 to hold the lightbulb and the other two to turn the ladder.
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MrMustang1965
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by smu diamond m » Sun Jul 16, 2006 3:59 pm
I've always heard it as:
How many tuba players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
100, 1 to hold the bulb and the other 99 to drink until the room spins.
Sir, shooting-star, sir. Frosh 2005 (TEN YEARS AGO!?!) The original Heavy Metal.
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smu diamond m
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by smupony94 » Sun Jul 16, 2006 10:31 pm
Oh lord, bad band humor
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by SMU Football Blog » Mon Jul 17, 2006 7:43 am
MrMustang1965 wrote:I lived in Houston from 1988 - 2004 and worked for the Houston Police Department. Not once - I repeat - NOT ONCE during that time do I recall a crime being reported to the department by someone attending a UofH athletic event, either at Robertson Stadium or at Hofheinz Pavilion.
Yes, some bad sh*t goes down in the wards surrounding UofH. But actual crimes on campus are few and far between.
Security on the UofH campus is very good. Emergency phones are strategically placed for quick access in all campus parking lots. Campus police are very visible, too.
I went to law school at the Univ. of Houston. Security is cr@p. It was so bad, the law school student bar paid for its own security after hours during finals. People that I know that lived on campus said it was awful.
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SMU Football Blog
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by friarwolf » Mon Jul 17, 2006 8:31 am
I think SFA has the best approach of all the schools..................
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