Top 10: 2003 season surprises

[Letterman]

From the home office, High on the Hilltop, the top 10 surprises awaiting the SMU Mustangs during the 2003 football season:

10. Baylor Bears try to psyche out opponents by showing up in uniforms marked "Oakland Athletics" - because the colors are the same and the A's hit harder

9. Nevada unveils new slogan designed around return of injured RB Chance Kretschmer: "Nevada football: a game of Chance" - NCAA shuts down program, pending results of gambling probe

8. LaTech QB Luke McCown blames 4-interception performance in loss to SMU on his parents, who are seen wearing brother Josh McCown's old #15 SMU jersey to game

7. SMU shocks Oklahoma State; in post-game press conference, Coach Bennett cites Ponies' inspiration: "I told them we were playing the Dallas Cowboys, and our guys didn't want to be the only team to lose to the Cowboys this year"

6. UTEP players delayed in entry to Ford Stadium because of lengthy identity check; security guard explains he "always cards Miners"

5. TCU Horned Frog mascot missing from season finale after being called to play lead role in doomed-to-fail "When Mars Attacks 2"

4. After watching their team lose first seven games, Tulsa fans miss SMU game after mistakenly showing up at TU intramural fields, assuming football is no longer a varsity sport

3. New Fresno State towel boy: Jerry Tarkanian

2. Still riding euphoric wave over Rice's NCAA baseball title, Owls players turn despondent to learn they can't carry baseball bats on field

And the #1 surprise awaiting the SMU Mustangs during the 2003 football season:

1. Pregame announcement at San Jose State game: "Ladies and gentlemen, here to preside over the pregame coin toss: Governor Arnold Swarznegger"

[KnuckleStang]

This one might be your best yet. And 7 must be your lucky #, because once again it takes the cake.

[Roach]

#7 is my favorite, also.
But #6, #3, #4 and #5 are great, too!
(Nice movie reference - "Mars Attacks" might be the worst movie ever made.)

[Big Easy Pony]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Roach:
<B>(Nice movie reference - "Mars Attacks" might be the worst movie ever made.)</B></font><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I take it you haven't seen "Gigli" - if your wife/girlfriend makes you go, have a lot of drinks first and bring a pillow. It's beyond terrible.

Nice list!

[MustangFan]

Hilarious (except the Cowboys are going to win a lot with the Tuna in town!)

[Mister Ed]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Roach:
<B>#7 is my favorite, also.
But #6, #3, #4 and #5 are great, too!
(Nice movie reference - "Mars Attacks" might be the worst movie ever made.)</B></font><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Worst movie ever made?! It might not be Tim Burton's best, but he's incapable of a bad movie.
Rumor has it that Mars Attacks 2 is casting Ted Williams in Pierce Brosnan's old role as the bodiless scientist. Ba-dum Bah!

[Sam I Am]

The letterman deserves to be in the Diamond "M" Club with a red and blue school jacket for his witty defense of the alma mater. I like the "carding the miners" line.

[Hoss]

Awesome!

[ClassOf81]

OK, I nearly lost it when I got the mental picture of Tark aimlessly wandering the sideline with towels hanging out of his mouth.

[Buddha]

Somehow I doubt the McCown parents dust off Josh's SMU jersey too often.

#9 and #2 are a bit of a reach. But the list his great!

[ponyte]

The biggest surprise would be after SMU beats TT, a certain poster apologizes for calling other posters idiots and admits that he/she was wrong about the strength of the Ponies.

[Buddha]

WELL SAID!
I hope we get a chance to serve up a little crow soufflé to the skeptics.

[RedRiverPony]

#4 is dead-on -- although I'm not sure the Tulsa fans know where their stadium is now.

[Pony Up]

I just showed that list - especially #10 - to some of my Baylor alum friends down here. They had no response!

[Hoop Fan]

masterful. Well done, Letterman.