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Headsets
What is said between coaches in the heat of battle on the headsets remains off-limits to football fans. We see a lot of furtive talking behind play sheets, but what are they saying?
CTD endeavored this summer to find out, and heard five great/semi-great/fairly funny moments in headset history.
The coach: new Texas A&M boss Mike Sherman (10). The headset moment: Green Bay Packers against the Chicago Bears, 2003, Lambeau Field.
What happened: In the words of the former Packers head coach: "I frantically asked [offensive coordinator] Tom Rossley, 'What's the name of that new screen we put in this week. ... I can't find it on the game plan.' ... Tom nervously and hastily surveyed the game plan and he couldn't find the name of it, either. As any head coach would do, I immediately put the blame on Tom and screamed, 'What the hell is the name of that screen? Where did you put it?' Tom responded by fumbling and stumbling with different attempts at its name and finally broke down and succumbed after my incoherent yelling and screamed, 'I guess I am just stupid. I am just stupid. I don't know the name of that [expletive] screen.' Upon hearing Tom's total frustration with me and the situation, I started laughing so hard I could barely call the play.
"I believe we ran a draw for lack of a better play instead of the screen I wanted, and it got us the first down.
"In hindsight, after surveying the defense, the screen would have been a dead play anyway, so here is a situation where our own comic relief won us the down."
At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
