College Football: What You Won't Hear This Season

[Huey78]

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/33737-college-football-what-you-wont-hear-this-season

Every now and then, we get some classic quotes in the world of college football. Some of those quotes come back to haunt those who murmur off-the-cuff remarks to the press.

Here is a preview of what you won't hear from our esteemed coaches and players this season.



"Our schedule looks a bit soft this year." Les Miles, LSU coach.

"Can we tone down the colors?" Mike Bellotti, Oregon Coach.

"Stop everything, hold it—we thought ASU was Athens State University." Mark Richt, Georgia Coach.

"At least we can count on the Navy game as a win." Charlie Weis, Notre Dame coach.

"I don't read fine print." Rich Rodriguez, Michigan coach.

"Hell yeah, I'm still going to win four Heismans." Ryan Perrilloux, ex-quarterback for LSU.

"Maybe that white Hummer limo entrance at the College Football Hall of Fame on signing day was a bit premature." Jimmy Clausen, quarterback, Notre Dame.

"No comment." Mike "I'm a man" Gundy, Oklahoma State coach.

"OK, I admit it. There's some things that even I can't turnaround." Steve Spurrier, South Carolina coach.

"I've decided to be a spokesman for YahooSports.com and ESPN." Pete Carroll, USC coach.

"I asked Kim Kardashian to be my wife because she stimulates my mind." Reggie Bush, Saints running back.

"What's the going rate for old playbooks on eBay?" Norm Chow, UCLA Offensive Coordinator.

"No pressure, no pressure at all." Mike Stoops, Arizona coach.

"We're going bowling this year." Any Baylor fan.

"Why would I think about Joe Pa's record?" Bobby Bowden, FSU coach.

"Who's Bobby Bowden? Joe Paterno, Penn State coach.

"We are thrilled to be in the Capitol One Bowl, again." Bret Bielema, Wisconsin coach.

"Tim Tebow is overrated." Urban Meyer, Florida coach.

"USC sucks." Mark May, ESPN college football analyst.

"Notre Dame sucks." Lou Holtz, ESPN college football analyst.


"The Big Ten sucks." Kirk Herbstreit or Lee Corso, ESPN college football analysts.

"We don't make rash decisions here based on emotions." Bill Stewart, West Virginia coach.

"I view Duke's AD position as a promotion from my previous job." Kevin White, ex-Irish AD.

"I'm never leaving (insert state here), it's my home." Nick "Can I get that to go?" Saban, Alabama coach.

"We are focusing are being the top defensive team in the nation." Mike Leach, Texas Tech coach.

"Can you make those donuts sugar-free?' Phil Fulmer, Tennessee coach.

"This is Pete Carroll's last year in college football, again." Jim Harbaugh, Stanford coach.

"We do everything by the book here." Rick Neuheisel, UCLA coach.

"Football isn't that important in Nebraska." Bo Pelini, Nebraska coach.

"Of course we don't miss Vince Young." Mack Brown, Texas coach.

"We aren't looking ahead to any particular game." Jim Tressel, Ohio State coach.

"We love the current BCS system." Gary Pinkel, Mizzou coach.

"Where can I buy a pair of flip-flops and a lei for the game?" June Jones, SMU coach.

"What amazes me is how my new office always has small scraps of papers and pens lying around." Bobby Petrino, Arkansas coach.

"Pullman, Washington is a fertile recruiting ground." Paul Wulff, Washington State coach.

"Can we request a Pac-10 officiating crew for the Red River Shootout?" Bob Stoops, Oklahoma coach.

"Oh well, there's always basketball season." Any Syracuse or Kentucky fan.

"%$#$% &^%^%^ $#@$#$" Bronco Mendenhall, BYU coach.

"We're going green." Chris Petersen, Boise State coach.

[Ikus]

Thanks Huey78 - needed the laugh!