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Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Fri Oct 03, 2003 5:28 pm
by ThadFilms
College Football Diary is on Holiday

Due to work related commitments PonyExress83’s College Football Diary went on Hiatus. It will be back next week.


So this week I guess I’ll just take a little time for humor. A top ten list and a list of SMU nicknames. They’re dumb and immature, but then again so was college. I hope you enjoy.

The Webmaster asked Letterman to compile a PonyFans.com Promotions top ten list. I do not want to steal Letterman’s thunder, but anyone who knows me, knows that I used to make a living with Top Ten Lists. I waited for a while, but Webmaster’s challenge was to appealing to pass up. So Letterman, I hope I do not offend you (tell me if I am encroaching on your turf), as I present…


Top Ten REJECTED PonyFans.com Promotions

10. Free PF (PonyFan) kazoo for next 1000 P.F. Chang’s customers.

9. PonyFans.com Pre-Game Pep Talk by MizterTea, Suckaz.

8. The PonyFans.com Shawn Heilbron Swimsuit Calendar.

7. Grass roots “Dome Ford” campaign.

6. The PonyFanatic.

5. Free PonyFans.com Cherry Slush Fund Slushees for every child under twelve.

4. The PonyFans.com Punch, Curse, and Kick Personal Foul Challenge.

3. PonyFan Relish! It’s what’s for dinner.

2. Webmaster, Smoo Power, and MrMustang1965 form rap group entitled Run PFC and tour the country with hip hop versions of “Varsity”, “She’ll be loaded with Peruna”, and “Call to the Horses”. With Stallion providing the phat beats and the random “Uh-huh, uh-huh, yeah”. (“Ain’t no party like a Mustang party! Ahh-AH! Put yer hands in the air!”)

And the number one REJECTED PonyFans.com Promotion…

1. PonyFans.com Official Peruna Dung!


And now for a few nicknames… You might have to say a couple of these out loud, or take a second to think about them, or just decide “this is dumb” and check out another post.

Richard “Show me the way to the next whiskey” Bartel
Richard Bartel “me that you need me”
Richard Bartel “& James Cooler”
Richard “If you’re going to the” Bartel “John I said hi”

Keylon “Lemon Lime” Kincaide
Keylon “Next of” Kincaide
Keylon “Pie” Kincaide
Keylon Kincaide “of emergency break glass”

Chris “wily and” Cunningham
Chris Cunningham “an eggs”

Johnnie “if the shoe” Fitzgerald

Trent “Buy a vowel” Hrncir

Austin “No- he’s not really Eve-y, he’s more” Adami

“Bring out the welcome” Matt Rushbrook
Matt “Why the” Rushbrook
Matt “No fraternity, I forgot to” Rushbrook
Matt “By hook or by” Rushbrook

Tate “of Emergency” Wallis
Tate “Don’t call me the Berlin” Wallis
“Willis” Tate Wallis
Tate “Whatchu talkin’ ‘bout” Wallis
“No, it’s more of a recessive” Tate Wallis

Jonas “Thanks for all you’ve shown us” Rutledge
Jonas “stuck in a” Rutledge

Rolando “spells relief” Humphrey

Don “can you” Ieremia-Stansbury

Brian “I’ll take your” Bischoff “with my queen”
Brian “Smack my” Bischoff
Brian “The Boulevard’s on” Bischoff

Cedric “It’s not reindeer, it’s” Vinson

Brent “Show her how much you” Karrington

Ryan “This” Mentzel “is making me thirsty”
Ryan “That is not what I” Mentzel
Ryan “Legend of” Mentzel “-da”


Beat the hell out of the University of TEP. I’ll be back next week with another thoroughly refreshing edition of College Football Diary.

See you on the Jumbotron.

-PonyExpress83

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Fri Oct 03, 2003 5:34 pm
by The Hammer
Greatness. :thumbupcool:

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Fri Oct 03, 2003 6:46 pm
by KnuckleStang
That's a herculean effort there, PE83. Personally, I'm partial to Tate "what-chu-talkin-bout" Wallis, and Brian "smack my" Bischoff. And I eagerly await the Ponyfans.com relish.

Here's another: Brad "Real Men Don't Eat" Kieschnick? Oh well, can't fault a guy for trying...

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Fri Oct 03, 2003 7:13 pm
by ThadFilms
Thanks Hammer (Don't hurt 'em).

Knuckle, how can you not love a quiche joke? I laughed. Brad "Went to La Madelaine but forgot the" Kieschnick- you could go on forever.

How's NY treating you? I love that city. Oh, and I hear that Run PFC is performing with Tone Loc up there... in support of their new hit- "Funky Cole Peruna".

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Fri Oct 03, 2003 7:42 pm
by KnuckleStang
Yeah! But I heard it was unceremoneously cancelled, due to New York's complete indifference to, and ignorance of college sports. Last time they played here, the poor folks at Nightingale's assumed "Peruna" was a greek goddess. Milo-Z-Steppin'-Out, still hoping to open for them, lobbied on their behalf, but to no avail.

Joey "Shaken Not" Sturdivant. HIYOOO!

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Sat Oct 04, 2003 7:36 am
by HixsontoLeVias
....as they said on Animal House, "it wasn't that good..", don't hurry back with your elongated ennui posts..... :thumbdown:

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Sat Oct 04, 2003 1:10 pm
by ThadFilms
Knuckle-

That's ashame, man! I can't believe they canceled the gig! All my college buddies who live up there (and that's a good majority of them)- were planning on rockin' out to the smooth PFC sounds. I did hear that Jay-Z is pumped to be opening for them in Rochester, but White Lion is playing across the street- so it may kill the gate.

Kudos on Sturdivant.

And HixsontoLeVias-

Thanks for your unending support. It warms the cockles of my heart. I realize, "it wasn't that good" but I was born into it, so that's that. And ennui is good. If we didn't long for anything- why live?

-PE83

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Sat Oct 04, 2003 3:09 pm
by Hoofprint
Keep it ccoming, PE83!
Unbelievable. Great stuff.

Re: Rejected PonyFans.com Promotions & Player Nicknames

PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2003 1:46 pm
by Letterman
#1 is funny, and #4 is even better.
#2 is a little unsettling.
#8 scares the hell out of me.

This is great stuff, PE83!