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From the home office, High on the Hilltop, the top 10 activities for the SMU football players during their open weekend:

10. Leave open cans of tuna and cracked raw eggs in visitors' locker room so TCU gets fragrant welcome next week

9. Circulate a letter on President Turner's stationery, demanding that all coaches grow a Phil Bennett-style moustache

8. Construct their own Top 10 list: "Why TCU has no business dreaming of a BCS bid"

7. Get new receiver gloves for whole team, to make sure to get a good grip on the Gatorade jug when dumping it on Coach Bennett

6. Visit Tom Hicks to propose trading Mustang Maniac mascot for shortstop/defensive lineman Alex Rodriguez; defense suddenly has personal massage therapists, and football team rules intramural softball

5. Entree at every meal for the next week: Frog legs

4. Choreograph elaborate team celebration for end zone after Blake Warren returns two punts for scores in season finale

3. Start a betting pool (only for non-athletes, of course) to guess when Cameron Diaz will ditch that Timberlake dork for PonyFans.com's "Letterman"

2. Locate Dallas Mavericks guard Steve Nash's house, ring the doorbell until he comes out and then talk trash about the Mustangs whipping his alma mater (Santa Clara) in the NCAA soccer tournament

And the #1 activity for SMU football players duiring their open weekend :

1. Stop season-long sandbagging routine, knock off TCU to regain all-time series lead

We still haven't seen a photo of your child, Letterman. What's up with that? Maybe Mister T has one to post on this thread! :whistling:

<img src="http://www.amarillonet.com/images/headlines/110702/8c.jpg" alt=" - " />

Once again, Mister T RULES! :thumbupcool:

Nice one - but I think we are a little sensitive around here to references to intramural outings by the football team members -

The Maniac for A-Rod? Sounds like a sweet trade. And Hicks just might do it.

(A little advice: don't hold your breath on Cameron Diaz calling, unless your paycheck matches that of the "other" Letterman.)

#1 is the best entry you've had on any of these lists!

Go Ponies!

I think Dement's already gotten the memo about the Phil Bennett Style Moustache.

<img src="http://home.swbell.net/bigdog24/dementstache.jpg" alt=" - " />

That's cold, MizterTea -- nothing like rubbing a little salt in the wounds, huh?

And nice work, Peruna_Ate_My_Rolex! That picture is scary as hell, but hysterical nonetheless. (And no, we don't need to see Coach Rompola and Coach Seifert sporting the new Turner-imposed look.)

I sure hope you're right about Blake Warren reaching the end zone a couple of times next week!

Nice Steve Nash/Santa Clara reference! Especially since he's a big soccer nut and his sister was recruited to play soccer for the Ponies! I bet he'll have one eye on the game.

Go Ponies!!!!!