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From the home office, High on the Hilltop, the Top 10 surprises revealed during preparation for the inaugural Fort Worth Bowl:

10. Boise State's Bronco mascot really a reindeer laid off by Santa Claus after being caught drinking and flying

9. Schobel family agitated at coach Gary Patterson after TCU coach crashed family Thanksgiving gathering in Columbus, Texas, asking asking all family members to start having more sons and send them to TCU -- immediately

8. Boise State QB Ryan Dinwiddie storms out of mid-week press conference after being asked by a reporter for the umpteenth time: "How are things going with Trista?"

7. TCU placekicker Nick Browne (5'10", 172 .... allegedly) amused to see his picture on new NCAA-issued anti-steroid poster; insists strong leg actually a result of years of practice.

6. After getting his first look at Amon Carter Stadium, Boise State coach Dan Hawkins overheard muttering "Bet they wish President Ford had gone here instead of SMU"

5. TCU's Horned Frog mascot banned from appearing at game after being seen shaking her (?) money maker and making out with Baylor's bear mascot in late-night "Girls Gone Wild" infomercial

4. During pre-game coin toss, Boise State players invite Frogs to fly back to Boise with them after the game so they can do some Christmas shopping "in a city"

3. Boise State fans wonder aloud why all those crazy Texas schools play on fields that are green instead of "normal" blue

2. Boise State officials declare Broncos for favorite to receive Mountain West Conference bid because, after all, the Broncos know what mountains look like

And the #1 surprise revealed during preparation for the Fort Worth Bowl:

1. Raising the academic standards at TCU -- prompting school officials to reject the GMAC Bowl's bid so the students could focus on exams: valedictorian Jessica Simpson

Way to come strong, Letterman. I'm guessing it's safe to say Trista the tramp and Jessica Simpson have never made an appearance on PonyFans.com before. Nice effort.

Is drinking and flying a felony in the North Pole?

Thanks for the mental image of the Frog shakin' it on the GGW video (not to mention getting it on with the Baylor mascot). I think I'm going to be ill.

Pretty good, Letterman.

Knowing what we know about BSU, surprise number #11 will be if the Frogs get permission to leave their remedial studying classes and show up for the game.

Listen to Sam, Letterman - this should have been a Top 11 list!
I was starting to wonder about when we'd see the next list - you do a great job with these things.

Not bad, Letterman. Not your best list, but not bad.
Work up some good ones over the holidays (a little liquid creativity at holiday parties can go a long way!)

How about a basketball-related list?

Whooo finally theday of the TCU beat down has come!

We like to joke about TCU because, well, they're TCU. But kudos to Coach Patterson and BSU coach Hawkins for suspending the guys who broke rules. They could have let it slide and put their best guys out there, but both coaches showed real integrity.

#7 is a little ironic now, huh?
I don't mean to talk trash - Browne is the best college kicker I've ever seen. Hope he does well at the next level.

Letterman makes a good point with #9. I'm glad there's no more Schobels on the way to FW.