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You want to eat bad salad then get the f*** out of here. I mean, if you're not going to slice cucumbers Gerald Myers, if you're just gonna let him pile on the croutons, and the rest of you are gonna let him take the bowl outside the sneeze guard, and drive all the way in here without one guy charging him 30 cents an ounce, then I'm leaving and you f***ing guys will chop onions 'til you can't eat supper. Now I am tired of this s***. I'm sick and f***ing tired of brown, limp lettuce. I'm f***ing tired of losing to Purdue. I'm not here to f*** around this week. Now you may be, but I'm not. Now I am gonna f***ing guarantee you, that if these carrots aren't fresh Monday night, you aren't gonna believe the next four f***ing days. Now I am not here to eat meat on Monday. Now you better f***ing understand that right now. This is absolute f***ing bulls***. Now I'll f***ing run your imitation bacon bits right into the ground. I mean I'll f***ing run you, you'll think last night was a f***ing all-you-cat-eat buffet. I had to sit around for a f***ing year without a single black olive in this f***ing salad, and I mean you will not put me in that f***ing position again, or you will godd*** pay for it like you can't f***ing believe. Now, you better get your head out of your a**.

Brown, is that your handy work or is that floating around the internet? If you did it, my compliments, that Bob Knight audio tirade they play on the Tickets is priceless. The Salad Bar parody is even more funny.

<small>[ 02-06-2004, 01:53 PM: Message edited by: Hoop Fan ]</small>

I wish I could claim it as my own, but it is not mine.