Burger wars, re-visited

[Roach]

Is Big Rick's Sports Lounge even open? I thought I heard on the radio commercials that it was "opening soon." But maybe I'm mixed up with another ad....

[PK]

Are neophytes permitted to attend these 'Burger War' gatherings? I'd like to volunteer my services...as a faithful Mustang, as well as a hungry man!

Sorry... no neophytes allowed. Just kidding. Actually, despite whatasteve's response, there apparently is no real interest among the old Burger War warriors to launch into a new "burger war" (calories are hell). So organized forays into burger encounters are perhaps a thing of the past. However, if and when anyone comes across a great burger and fries, feel free to share the experience and use your good judgement in rating them.

[Dement-ed]

Don't quit -- keep the ratings coming. This thread has a life of its own, and I really enjoy it.

[White Helmet]

MM65, Im willing to pick up the fallen standard (banner for you uncultured) if you are. As a good ol' boy from West Texas, i love beef. If you want to renew the quest for the Holy Grail of burgers or just talk SMU sports over beef and beer let me know.

[couch 'em]

......"Just the good ol' boys,
Never meanin' no harm,
Beats all you've ever saw, been in trouble with the law since the day they was born."

Sorry, it was begging for it.

[MrMustang1965]

......"Just the good ol' boys,
Never meanin' no harm,
Beats all you've ever saw, been in trouble with the law since the day they was born."

Sorry, it was begging for it.

A little trivia for ya about the General Lee from "The Dukes of Hazzard". If you travel the back roads of the Texas Hill Country around Bandera, TX...you might just see that famous red car with the Stars & Bars painted on it. Former Duke's star John Schneider has a home in that area and he bought one of the cars after the show ended for his personal use and to race along with fellow actor Jim Caviziel.

[BoazHoes]

Here at the PIKE house we make some mean bugers! Our pledges are hard at work so come get all the fixen's.

[The XtC]

No interest? I thought that 3 of us had agreed to try Loons, and you were just waiting to hear from Punch when he would be available? WHatasteve, email me if you still want to go.

[that's great raplh]

myrtle burgers at the pike house were the best

[whatasteve]

At long last, a pilgrimage was made -- finally -- to The Loon. I've heard about this place since I was in school, and I'd never made it there. But the infamous Loon Burger finally was sampled. And frankly, this place was hard to evaluate.

First of all, the atmosphere is pretty cool -- kind of dark, lots of games on, etc. But one make-or-break element of your dining experience comes down to which waiter/waitress you got. We were served by quite possibly the largest idiot on the planet. Nachos that were ordered never arrived. Specifics on burger toppings were shamelessly ignored, or forgotten somewhere along the 20-foot walk from our table to the kitchen. (Some restaurants actually implore their waitstaff to WRITE DOWN customers' orders.) A request for "no pickles" translated to EXTRA pickles. Someone else at the table ordered mayo instead of mustard -- want to guess what arrived on his burger? (Hint: it wasn't mayo.) And apparently this particular waitress thought requests for rare/medium/well done were jokes, as these requests were ignored. (I realize this information would be more helpful if I'd gotten her name, but she wisely didn't put it on the check, and it was painful enough talking to her long enough to order another beer.)

The food itself was pretty good. The onion rings were better than average, to be sure. Not as good as those at Chip's, but a hell of a lot better than most places. The cheese fries, though, are extraordinary. Since the close of The Green Elephant, these have taken my (official and binding) designation as the best in Dallas -- yes, better than Snuffer's. They're that good.

However, this is about the burger itself, and it was surprisingly good. A little saltier than I prefer, and a little undercooked (I like them cooked longer than most folks, I realize, so it was probably in the "medium" range), but overall, very good. The bun could have been toasted, as the burger dripped a bit. Dripping is not a bad thing, of course, but the bun got a bit soggy. But the flavor of the meat was very good, with a slightly smoky flavor -- either from the grill in the kitchen or from the haze around the bar. Whatever the cause, it worked (once all pickles were removed.) I strongly recommend the Loon Burger -- just make sure you don't get served by the same corncob we did. Good luck figuring out who she is.

With that in mind, here is the new official, binding and unquestionable burger rankings:

1. Uptown Bar & Grill
2. First & 10
3. Rose's
4. Snookie's
5. Fuddrucker's
6. The Loon
7. Earl's
8. Jake's
9. Joe Willy's
10. Chips
11. Tipperary Inn
12. Adairs
13. Two Rows
14. Campisi's
15. Cheesecake Factory
16. Snuffers

[Dutch]

Question, since you've retired the Green Elephan's title to best cheese fries as of their close, isn't that a prescedent for removing Rose's from the burger list (since they've been boarded up for a while)?

[PK]

As usual Whatasteve, your "Official Burger Rankings" are your's alone and a concoction of your feeble mind. The OFFICIAL RANKINGS of the Burger Wars were recorded by Peruna Punch as follows:

"But if you're going to make a special night on the town for a burger, I'd recommend sticking with our Burg Off finalists.

1. Snookie’s
2. Uptown Bar & Grill
3. Fudrucker's
4. Joe Willy's
5. Snuffers
6. First & 10
7. Adair’s Saloon
8. Cheesecake Factory
9. Earl's
10. Campisi's
11. Gazebo Burger
12. Jake's
13. Two Rows
14. Chips
15. Rose’s
16. Tipperary Inn (closed by an act of divine burger justice)"

BTW, I don't think the Loon was around when you were in school, or at least not where it is now...but it makes for an interesting story line. Revisionist history only works in politics.

[whatasteve]

Now PK, you don't really want to get into an analysis of feeble minds, do you? And Peruna Punch can't be trusted on such things. Snuffer's at #5 is all the evidence needed there -- their cheese fries, chips and queso, chicken sandwiches, etc., make it a great place, but Mike Modano and his buddies should be using their burgers to remember what a slap shot looks like. And even on its worst day, Tipperary Inn is drastically better than some of the bottom-feeders on the list. Peruna Punch is a good man, but proper burger analysis must be left to the expert: me. Just accept it.

[PK]

Well, you are right about Punch...I didn't pay attention to his sliping Snuffers in there at five....that is way wrong, but your reported top two are incorrect as proven by a post from PX just after we finished the Burg Off:

"Just wanted to let folks know that the Burgoff is now complete, and it looks like regular season champ Snookies will retain the title, still just edging out the Uptown Bar and Grill. Fuddruckers held the top spot for several weeks in a surprisingly strong performance, but eventually was passed by the eventual champs, the snook burger.

Complete results ought to be posted soon. Peruna Punch has all the official judges ballots, and he's supposed to make them public....... someday."

As for feeble minds...I at least have an excuse...you on the other hand...

[whatasteve]

My only excuse is hanging out with feeble-minded folks. Is that condition contagious? Perhaps an influx of good burgers (see the Official and Binding list) will help!