From the only in America category:
Ann Arbor, MI: A distraught University of Michigan fan has filed a four million dollar lawsuit against Appalachian State for its victory over the University of Michigan’s football team last Saturday. The suit alleges that Appalachian State was to be a sacrificial lamb and by winning, Appalachian Sate violated an unwritten understanding that Michigan never loses to creampuffs. The suit alleges that Appalachian State knew or should have known that its football team was supposed to lose in an ignoble fashion to the University of Michigan.
Elton Alda is suing for four millions dollars damages, an apology and a forfeit by Appalachian State’s football program alleging that Appalachian State’s victory has caused serious mental anguish, lost sleep, and damaged self esteem and overall dysfunction with daily activities. Alda said, “You just can’t imagine how painful this whole ordeal has been. All the money, time and emotional effort I put into this game only to have a group of nobodies break a traditional BCS understanding to be a sacrificial lamb. All I have been able to do is cry.â€