December 27, 2007
• Before I scream at another newspaper columnist, I, Mike Gundy, will make sure I've at least accomplished something in my career. Not getting blown out by Troy would be a nice start.
• The next time we need to hire a softball coach, a swimming instructor or even a new janitor, we, the administrators at the University of Michigan, promise to look somewhere other than West Virginia.
• The next time I cheat on an Internet test, I, (Florida State football player), promise to use a proxy server.
• The next time I accept a head coaching job, I, Dennis Franchione, promise to leave my handler, Mike McKenzie, at home.
• We, the administrators at SMU, promise to hire a football coach by the start of spring practice – even if we have to pluck an assistant from the staff at Highland Park High School.
