Burger wars, re-visited

[PK]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by whatasteve:
<B>PK, do we REALLY need to bring up the obvious reason for questioning Mrs. PerunaPunch's judgement?

Then again, she and I tend to agree on chow preferences a lot more than her husband agrees with either of us. Then again (again?), he's named after a liqueur.</B></font><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You may have a point about her judgement in some things, but her taste in burgers is impeccable!!!

[PX]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by BoazHoes:
<B>I am starting to figure out who is who...Rambo must be Clint Snowden and PX is Glen Ivey. </B></font><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Actually my name is Jon Embree, and I'm about 15 years older than Ivey. I mentioned the years I was here the first time we argued, over on the basketball message board. Nice to see you're paying attention.

By the way, I cant help but notice that you completely rewrote the wise-assed reply you gave me, after I showed you the actual NCAA rule. Its always nice to meet a guy with so much backbone. You never did answer my question, though. What sport did you play?

[BoazHoes]

My name is Willard and I am a bouncer at the elephant, my sport was.....well you may argue it wasn't a sport but I was a trainer for 2 years.

[Eddie P]

Please God tell me you're not Willard from the Elephant. He was my TA many years ago for an ME class.

[pimpin boazhoaz]

No, he is not willard...isn't that right, Wes?

[BoazHoes]

Ok your right I am not Willard...my name is Cash, I was an intramural ref and I led PIKE to Championships in softball and flagfootball for 3 years straight!
Go Red
Go Blue
Go PIKE

[Eddie P]

You are not Cash McElroy. I know Cash McElroy and you sir are no Cash McElroy.

Unless we're in a time warp and the year is 1995.

[whatasteve]

The official report on that Grande Burger at Two Rows:

First of all, the thing is in fact "grande" - muy grande. There's enough meat in this thing to feed a pack of wolves. Two half-pound patties that look like hubcaps. And, just to make sure all arteries are completely sealed shut, they slap a layer of barely cooked bacon on top. Enough grease on this thing to make it ooze out of your pores.

With that said, it's not a bad slab of beef. A little crumbly, perhaps, but tasty. With a carcass that big on your plate, they could stand to add a second slive of cheese. Toasted bun is nice, if only because it helps hold the thing together amid the flood of free-flowing burger grease. Noticable absence of onion. Flavor was OK, but not exceptional. Meat quality was better at Campisi's, but this one rates equal if only because of the sheer quantity of flesh they offer up to the burger gods.

Fries were average at best. Tasted OK, but way too salty. Nothing special.

Include the fries, and the current ranking (you're welcome, PK) is:
1. Campisi's
2. Two Rows

[PK]

I guess I need to stop smoking, I had to add salt to my fries in order to taste something! I being much smarter than the other guys refrained from ordering the Grande burger and had a more normal Brewers Burger (one slab of beef). It had lettuce, tomatoes, pickles and purple onions and was not bad at all. The bun was not a traditonal hamburger bun and rather spongy (I knocked points off for the bun). The meat was actually tasty as it was cooked over an open fire which gave it some flavor and the consistency was of real ground beef. I have to agree with Whatasteve though that the Campisi's burger is still rated number one in my book at this point. On to the next test!!!

[Rambo]

I have to comment again on the Two Row's grande burger. I found it to be dry. As far as 1 pounders go, Ball's is the best I have had. The fries are also good.

[whatasteve]

PK, we don't consider your decision to go with the diet burger to be a sign of unique or exceptional judgement. We see that as an admission that you were afraid the big'un might be better than your sacred Campisi's creation.

And about that idea of quitting smoking: Blasphemy! Nobody likes a quitter.

[Pony4Life]

Ball's is completely overrated on burgers and on fries. I realize it's an institution in the Park Cities, so it will always prosper, but their burgers and fries are cafeteria quality, at best.

Campisi's and Two Rows are both vastly superior.

[PX]

When I speak of a truly great burger I talk about 2 half-pound beef slabs, medium rare, their outer surface seared over an open flame, but leaving the interior pink and juicy as it was meant to be. The beef patties seperated by a single slice of cheddar cheese, crisscrossed by two thick strips of honey pepper bacon and packaged inside a toasted bun. Served in a pool of its own grease, with onion rings on the side. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Two Rows Grande Burger.
I must agree with Steve that the burger was certainly large enough to support a second slice of cheese, and a single circle of red onion was not nearly enough. I solved the 2nd problem by inserting 2 of my onion rings within the perimeter of the burger itself, and this worked out well.
Rambo, you must have gotten your burger on a bad night, or ordered it well done (overdone) or something, because none of ours appeared even slightly dry. If my burger had been any juicier I would have drowned in it. It was so juicy the bottom half of the bun liquified, I had to turn it over to finish eating it.
While the scarcity of onion was no laughing matter, it was a situation easily remedied, and I found this to be a superior burger, overall. I'm sorry PK, but this one topped Campisi on the virtue of both size, and it was better cooked. The Campisi waiter never asked how I wanted mine cooked, and it came very well done. I like'em rare and bloody, and the Grande Burger came just the way I wanted. I've had the mushroom burger at Two Rows, as well, and enjoyed it immensely.
Somebody email me and remind me where we're going next week. We talked about so many different places I cant remember where we finally decided on.

[PK]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by whatasteve:
<B>We see that as an admission that you were afraid the big'un might be better than your sacred Campisi's creation.</B></font><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Far, far from the truth. Admit it, even you questioned your judgement after it was placed in front of you. I learned a long time ago to treat my stomach with respect....if not, it will make me veeery sorry. Besides that, even you know that size does not necessarily equate to quality, why else would you question Mrs. PerunaPunch's judgement?

Now, if I'm going to eat a pound of beef, it's going to be a nice thick juicy ribeye steak not some freakshow hamburger.

[BleedingRed+Blue]

"Besides that, even you know that size does not necessarily equate to quality, why else would you question Mrs. PerunaPunch's judgement?"

Come on, stop it. That's too easy.

What's next on the burger rankings?