It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

This is the forum for talk about SMU Football

Moderators: PonyPride, SmooPower

peruna81
PonyFans.com Legend
PonyFans.com Legend
Posts: 3795
Joined: Sun Feb 11, 2001 4:01 am
Location: central Texas

It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by peruna81 »

back in the good 'ol days of the SWC, it was tradition to share among friends and acquaintances the buffoonery that is Texas A&M...in view of our first opponent, it seems appropriate that we should indulge again.

I propose a bit of a contest, from now until September 3 at 10 am CST, that those jokes posted here be judged by Mrydel and ponyte as to content/relevancy/and overall humor, with a winner selected and announced.

The winner selected must be present at the game, and will receive a gift certificate for two at College Station's finest chicken establishment, Layne's.


just to start things off:

What is the difference between Aggies and Rice Crispies?
...Rice Crispies know what to do in a bowl...

I'll be here all week...tip your waiter...try the veal...
stable-boy for the four horsemen of the apocalypse
User avatar
One Trick Pony
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 9887
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2008 8:17 pm

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by One Trick Pony »

What do Aggies think Cheerios are?
Donut seeds.
User avatar
ponydawg
PonyFans.com Legend
PonyFans.com Legend
Posts: 3444
Joined: Mon Oct 28, 2002 4:01 am

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by ponydawg »

How can you tell when an Aggie has used your computer?

There's "White-Out" all over the screen.
User avatar
abezontar
PonyFans.com Legend
PonyFans.com Legend
Posts: 3888
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2002 4:01 am
Location: Mustang, TX

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by abezontar »

How do you get a one-armed Aggie out of a tree?

wave to him
The donkey's name is Kiki.

On a side note, anybody need a patent attorney?

Good, Bad...I'm the one with the gun.
User avatar
SMU 86
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 12943
Joined: Wed Jan 09, 2008 6:41 pm

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by SMU 86 »

abezontar wrote:How do you get a one-armed Aggie out of a tree?

wave to him


:lol: LOL.
"We will play man to man and we will pick you up at the airport." - Larry Brown

________________________Champion________________________
Image
User avatar
Cadillac
Hall of Famer
Hall of Famer
Posts: 2184
Joined: Mon Aug 07, 2006 10:49 am
Location: McKinney

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by Cadillac »

An Aggie and a Mustang were sitting in a bar drinking beer and watching TV. The Newscast is covering the story of a man on the ledge of a building, threatening to jump. The Mustang turns to the aggie and says: "I'll bet you a hundrey bucks that he jumps." The aggie says "I'll take that bet!" a few minutes later the guy jumps to his death. The aggie pulls out the hundred bucks he had leftover from financial aid, and gives it to the Mustang.

Feeling a bit guilty the Mustang says "I can't take your money. That wasn't a live broadcast, and I'd already seen how it ended" "No, keep the money" replied the aggie, "I'd seen it earlier too, and thought there was no way he'd jump again."

-CoS
bubba pony
Heisman
Heisman
Posts: 1560
Joined: Fri May 30, 2003 3:01 am

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by bubba pony »

The star football player for the Aggies was failing his math class at the semester and had to pass his exam in order to play in the game that weekend at Kyle Field. The professor and the school board get together and decide to ask him one question at halftime of the game. If the aggie answers the question correctly, he passes and can play. However, if he answers incorrectly he fails the course and is ineligible. Well the game finally rolls around and everyone is anxious about the question.
At halftime the player and his professor go to the center of the field and over the loudspeaker the professor asks the question "What is two plus two?" The aggie thinks and thinks, finally he asks the professor if he can use a calculator. The professor says "No, your time is up". In desperation the aggie shouts into the microphone "Four!"

With that Kyle Field erupts into the chant of "Give him another chance, give him another chance!"
User avatar
PonyTime
PonyFans.com Legend
PonyFans.com Legend
Posts: 3985
Joined: Tue Dec 17, 2002 4:01 am
Location: The Green Elephant

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by PonyTime »

An Aggie had just completed his studies and was awarded a BS Degree in mechanical engineering. He was immediately hired by the Texas highway department.

His job was to paint the yellow stripe down the middle of the highway. After three days, his boss called him in and advised him that he was no longer needed.

When the Aggie inquired as to the reason for his dismissal, the boss replied, "On your first day here, you painted three miles of stripe, which is good. On your second day, you painted two miles; not as good, but still acceptable. Today, you only painted one mile. This is too far below our standards."

The Aggie accepted the explanation, saying on his way out the door, "Well, alright, but I want you to know, it wasn't my fault. The paint can kept getting farther away."
"Moral Victories Make Me Sick" - TR

Image
User avatar
Junior
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 11513
Joined: Sat Nov 25, 2006 11:56 am
Location: Dallas, TX

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by Junior »

An Aggie and another fellow are out working on the fenceline when they notice a cow with its head stuck between the wires of the fence. The one fellow (a Horned Frog if my memory serves me correctly) goes over to the cow in distress, pulls down his pants and proceeds to have his way with the forlorn cow.

After a while, the Frog goes back over the to the Aggie and says "You want to get yourself some of this action?". To which the Aggie replies, "You betcha!".

And then the Aggie proceeds to pull down his pants and...

stick his head between the wires on the fence.
Derail the Frogs!
Pony ^
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 5968
Joined: Sun Nov 15, 2009 5:23 pm
Location: Dallas, TX

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by Pony ^ »

Why is Texas A&M replacing the turf in their stadium with cardboard?

The team looks better on paper.
User avatar
PonyPlayer4
Hall of Famer
Hall of Famer
Posts: 2557
Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 12:47 pm
Location: Dallas, Tx

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by PonyPlayer4 »

Two Aggie football players were out in College Station partying. They were hootin' and hollering' when a bartender asked them why they were celebrating. The smart one said proudly that they had just finished a jigsaw puzzle and it only took 2 months. "2 months?!?" exclaimed the bartender. The aggie replied, "Yeah, but the box said 4-6 years."
SC Pony
Varsity
Varsity
Posts: 344
Joined: Mon Aug 29, 2005 4:49 pm
Location: Dallas, Texas

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by SC Pony »

How many aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One Hundred ...

One to turn the light bulb and ninety-nine to tell him about the A&M tradition behind screwing in light bulbs.
Pony ^
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 5968
Joined: Sun Nov 15, 2009 5:23 pm
Location: Dallas, TX

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by Pony ^ »

lwjr
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 8160
Joined: Wed Jul 11, 2007 9:37 pm
Location: Midland, Texas

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by lwjr »

Why did the Aggies replace the grass on the football field with artifical turf? So the homecoming queen would stop grazing.

What is the definition of an Aggie galloping gourmet? An Aggie chasing a trash truck
GO MUSTANGS!
User avatar
One Trick Pony
PonyFans.com Super Legend
PonyFans.com Super Legend
Posts: 9887
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2008 8:17 pm

Re: It has to be done...Aggie jokes...

Post by One Trick Pony »

PonyPlayer4 wrote:Two Aggie football players were out in College Station partying. They were hootin' and hollering' when a bartender asked them why they were celebrating. The smart one said proudly that they had just finished a jigsaw puzzle and it only took 2 months. "2 months?!?" exclaimed the bartender. The aggie replied, "Yeah, but the box said 4-6 years."



googled it :mrgreen:
Post Reply